While playing bass tonight, I had a thought: stop caring.
I turned 37 on Friday. Not much happens on your 37th birthday. It stops having significance at 21, in terms of what you can do, and maybe has a touch of significance otherwise at 30. I suppose 40 will be something.
The older I get, the more I feel I have some idea what I'm doing. Not too much. But while I was improvising on the bass tonight, wondering whether I really felt like playing at that moment, I had this thought - I am here, playing, so I might as well try and let out what was in my head. I wonder if I can apply this mode of thinking to my research work. Yes, I'm under pressure to publish. Yes, I'm busy all the time with no time to do anything. So why not have fun with it? Why not at least not half-ass it, and let my heart and soul flow out onto the page and the laboratory?
I would rather do 10 minutes of real, actual, deep, creative work a day than 10 hours of crap. Let's see if I can accomplish that.
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