February 20

Almost a month since my last post. I'm making progress towards getting papers out the door, but nothing submitted yet. 

I need to get things into gear in the next few days. If I get too far into March, it'll be too late.

Let's just fucking go for it. Let me reach out for what I really want in life: to be a rock star. At science and at music. Let me not take "no" for an answer.

Isn't that what I'm really driven to do?

January 25

January is almost over. 

I need to kick things into high gear if I'm going to get any papers submitted. 

AOPs. 

AHTF.

Self-pumping.

I will put one foot in front of the other.

December 19

A few months to go before I submit my dossier.

Listening to Arctic Monkeys reminds me of the time I spent in Italy. Wonderful trip. Let me make something out of that conference presentation.

I need to pick the five papers that represent my best work. I need to have 5 rock solid items.

1. CoffeeBots is the one no-brainer.
2. Chemokinesis is a likely one. It's a neat piece of work that I can tie directly into the Trailblazer work. It's a distinct possibility.
3. The other ones are tough. I would very, very much like to include the follow-up experimental paper on AHTF here. 
4. It would be nice to also include either the AOPs work, since I originated that project in David Warsinger's parents' living room/kitchen, or something on the IPF work that involves microswimmers. 
5. Maybe something with Sajad as well. Either the J. Mol. Liq. paper or, ideally, the follow-up one on the novel data center design concept.

Make the 80% of days the ones you get to work on time and put in an honest day's labor. 

November 4

Quick post tonight to say that I have a fire in my belly. 

Laurie said something last week that inspired me. "You don't have kids." As a way of saying "what are you waiting for?"

I wish to honor my true self. All the past few weeks, months, and years are coming down to this. May I lose the fear of looking foolish. May I embrace the confidence of Paul Hollywood and Arnold Schwarzenegger. May I take good care of myself and make things better for others who are suffering in the world. May I read widely, curiously, carefully, critically (including Arnold's new book). There is plenty of work to be done.

Let me live like my life depends on it.

October 21

A month later than my previous post, I look back fondly on the trip to Italy. I feel that I did indeed get some good recharging in. With J gone since the 11th, I've enjoyed having the house (and my schedule) to myself. It's good to do once in a while. I've gotten to play a bunch of gigs, netting myself some extra cash. I've gotten to get some exercise. And the CoffeeBots paper was accepted!

Had a gig with Peter and Tom at LACH this evening. We sounded especially good during the first set tonight. I'm pleased with my playing. Take-aways:

1) Try to listen to how the whole group sounds. Is it what we want people to be hearing? In this particular case, we wanted coffeehouse jazz: smooth, but with a spring in its step.

2) Wearing the hat made me bolder and more confident. I need to do things that get me in that mode.

3) Connected with #1 and #2, I thought a bit less than normal about my solo ideas, and they just came. Naturally.

Tomorrow, I have the privilege of the day to myself. May I use it well, and do the work I need to do and also get some time to truly recharge my body, mind, and soul.

September 22

Here I am on the opposite side of the earth from where I usually am. I have the treasure of two unfettered days in the Murano and Venice regions to myself. May I use them to recharge.

A note of inspiration tonight came from Arctic Monkeys. They make me want to work hard and always stay true to myself. I visualize myself giving my own P&T seminar in about a year's time. May I speak from a place of deep ambition and proudly display my life's work up to that point. May I put in the work that Alex Turner et al. undoubtedly put into their music. 

May I do myself justice.

August 14

Once again, summer has blown by. It was reasonably productive for me - I got some papers submitted (and resubmitted), and also submitted the CAREER. I visited Seattle, Charlottesville, and Denver. Things were not perfect; I let work creep in when it shouldn't have. I didn't start planning my course until very recently. But I've also had some good moments. 

In any case, I am here and it is now. I sit on the cusp of my final full year on the tenure track before I need to submit my package. In some ways, I've been more successful than I thought I would be, especially in getting grant funding. In other ways, I have not quite gotten where I want to be yet, especially in publishing papers that I am leading. That has proven to be difficult.

So I will just lay it all on the line this school year. I am going to get started soon, and submit at least 4 papers before the year's end. Especially in (1) IPF, (2) AHTF, (3) DNA nanoswimmers. This will get me started toward my life's work: to use my scientific training and intelligence to develop engineering solutions that help us address climate change and disease.

I pledge to start an aggregation of small improvements. Starting with writing from 9-10 in the morning, every day, during the school year. No phone. Door closed. No email.