September 13

It is important for me to set high standards for myself. Looking back, those mentors who had the greatest effect on me were the ones who held me to a high standard. I still remember the language in Jankowski's syllabus:

The expectations and standards imposed in this class will be "high."

Of course, Dwight also held me to a high standard. If you set a high standard, oftentimes people will rise to meet it. If you set a low standard, some people will exceed it, but some will just do the bare minimum.

I will be a nice teacher, but also a demanding one. I will cultivate a fun atmosphere, but I will also impose high standards. In the classroom and in the lab. On others and on myself.

This is related to minimalism. Minimalism is a form of imposing high standards. It is the recognition that not everything deserves to be in your life. Not all words deserve to be said. 

September 5

My priority is to do excellent scientific work that is robust and holds up to scrutiny. 

As I said to Jason today, I really enjoy writing.

I truly do love science (not like the fb page). I truly do love to teach.

I am not going to forget this. Like during my practice sessions over the weekend, I will remember to have genuine fun.

This will guide me forward.

September 4

While playing bass tonight, I had a thought: stop caring. 

I turned 37 on Friday. Not much happens on your 37th birthday. It stops having significance at 21, in terms of what you can do, and maybe has a touch of significance otherwise at 30. I suppose 40 will be something. 

The older I get, the more I feel I have some idea what I'm doing. Not too much. But while I was improvising on the bass tonight, wondering whether I really felt like playing at that moment, I had this thought - I am here, playing, so I might as well try and let out what was in my head. I wonder if I can apply this mode of thinking to my research work. Yes, I'm under pressure to publish. Yes, I'm busy all the time with no time to do anything. So why not have fun with it? Why not at least not half-ass it, and let my heart and soul flow out onto the page and the laboratory? 

I would rather do 10 minutes of real, actual, deep, creative work a day than 10 hours of crap. Let's see if I can accomplish that.